mt. hiei

the trip to mt. hiei turned out a lot better than i had expected.

i avoided the people i didn't like as much as i could. separation into smaller groups did happen, but i made sure i was with my friends. there were several times when i missed out on what my professor was saying, but staying close to her helped a lot with that. the weather also took a turn for the better. it was even snowing a little on the mountain!
:)

i'll put up some pictures soon, but i already know they won't do much justice to the beauty of the landscapes and the antiquity of the temples.

we went up by cable car for part of the way and hiked everywhere else from there on out. i didn't take notes, so i don't know the names of the places and halls we visited. (i'll ask prof. ludvik for the details of the trip.)

there's no way i can easily explain what i saw and felt yesterday. many buddhist practices are simply mind-blowing. i can't even begin to imagine the pain, exhaustion, and trials that some monks put themselves through. (again, more details on this later.)

i realized a couple things from being on mt. hiei. i love the mountains. i like snow. the cold doesn't really bother me. i only had on a tank top layered with a long-sleeved shirt and a light hoodie all day. my point is, i felt freedom on that mountain. i was away from all the stupid girls on shijo dori, away from the suffocation of the host family system, and (somewhat) away from the smothering of akp. it's not necessarily japan that i dislike. if i had money to travel around the country, i'd be much happier. i'll come back to this later.

i'm still exhausted from last night.
=)

five more minutes...

it's 6am on a saturday morning.

if i were at midd, i'd be excited to start the day.
if i were at midd, i'd be getting ready to head to ross for breakfast.
if i were at midd, i'd be starting on the work for the upcoming week.

but no.

i'm trapped in japan with a nine-hour field trip to (not) look forward to.
going to mt. hiei ~ which would be awesome under normal circumstances

BUT
- it's a full class at 20 people (many of whom i do not care for)
- all hiking up the mountain (separation into smaller groups will happen)
- with our professor lecturing (probably won't hear much of anything)
- miserable weather (just peachy...)

maybe yesterday was just an "off" day.

i was so exhausted mentally from trying to enjoy japan that i couldn't even bring myself to go to the gym, my happy place (besides coffee shops) v_v

my test went fine as expected. all minor mistakes according to my teacher. when i went in to get my exam, 10% of the time was going over mistakes, and the rest of the time was spent explaining how i don't study anymore because i lack motivation >_< she said i wasn't the only who felt this way.

no surprise there.

edit:
yeah, it feels like my situation sucks.
but i have to remember it could be worse.

matt:
well a woman was attacked by a chimpanzee
and her face and both of her hands were ripped off
and partially eaten by it
her day sucks

a positive attitude goes a long way, i know that.
it's going to take a lot out of me to see today in a brighter light.
but i'll do it. i'll try my best.

some things

i've been meaning to make this list for quite some time now.

things i like about japan:

• food & drink ~ yatsuhashi (mia, thanks for the reminder!), veggie tempura, tonkatsu, kitsune soba, curry ramen, inarizushi, konbu onigiri, okonomiyaki, gyoza, peach & pineapple cocktails in a can from the konbini, curry pan, matcha softserve, nabe (tofu)
  
• onsen & sento! (hot springs and public bath)
• being able to go to temples & shrines whenever i want
• the amenities at my sports club
• radiating "fans" (awesome heater)
• "ethnic shops" for inexpensive jewelry
  
• knowing exactly when the next train will come
  
• convenience of "phone sex" ~ infrared communication between cell phones
  
• full-length bathroom stall doors

...i'll keep adding to this list, but why is it so difficult to make??
v_v

a sunnier outlook

i owe my (more) positive attitude about the last several months in japan to several people/places/things:

• matt && my friends who are also counting down the days
  
• tokyo and arashiyama
• the gym and my love of cheerleading

my friend matt from summer school has been endlessly supportive and helping me to find my motivation again. i've always been in awe of his study habits ~ i still don't think he understands just how much he inspires me :)

my friends who share in my "misery" (you know who you are ^_^) ~ thanks for all the "tollbooths" since october. it's always refreshing to just laugh about how crazy japan can be sometimes :) reminiscing about midd, language school, and everything else in our twenty years of life thus far..... good times <3

despite being a short three-day stay, tokyo with mia and danielle was a breath of fresh air.
day one: shopping (aka, backpacking) in harajuku until late evening.
day two: waseda area with our friend lauren from japanese language school, dinner in shibuya with mia's friend lenna, and lesbian bar with becca and her friend from wellesley in shinjuku
day three: the national diet library with mia to do research for my senior project/thesis

arashiyama on valentine's day. mia and i got away from the shijo/sanjo area and explored a little bit. destination: a little temple/nunnery called gio-ji [google it] we actually made it without getting lost! :)

i've been going to the sports club for about three hours a day ~ i thought i would probably get worn out from strenuous exercise day after day, but so far so good :) it's been a great way for me to relieve the restlessness i often feel here. i also get to work on stunts and becoming even more flexible for next year's cheerleading season. i can't wait =D

[i'll write more about tokyo and arashiyama when i upload the pictures ^_^]

blahhh

the reading/writing midterm was ridiculously easy. and "studying" wouldn't have helped much. (if at all)

anyway, i had over five hours after the test until the ecology field trip. i could've gotten some "work" done, but i didn't. instead, i hung out with my friends in the akp lounge until most of them headed off for (the earlier) translation class. at that point, a few of my other friends and i decided to study some birds because the ecology professor hinted that there might be a field quiz. (and there was one---on the eurasian tree sparrow and pale thrush.) even after we reviewed various species, there was still a lot of time to kill before 3pm came around.

...and i became incredibly restless >_<

thankfully, the field trip to gosho was relatively fun :)
well, any time i spend with mia, nestor, and david (abramovitz) is awesome <3

went home. dinner. gym. shower. (and no hw, haha)
pretty typical day.

j'adore le français

again, in a nutshell:
[perhaps i'll elaborate later... but maybe not lol]

the oral "exam" went fine. i could've done a lot better (as compared to language school), but i'm satisfied with how i did. ben (wesleyan) and becca (wellesley) are two of my favorite people in the program ~ our oral interviews were one right after the other, so we went out for coffee in shijo afterward.

then i met up with mia at shijo eki and walked to kyoto eki from there. we went to see the robert doisneau gallery at an art museum on the seventh floor of the station. i miss french sooo much. even before the gallery, i've often thought about picking it up again. so i might. senior year :)

for lunch, subway! it was one of the most delicious lunches i've had in a while. first time in nearly six months. since there was nowhere we could go to just sit and do some studying, we settled for the mister donut food court. and we sat there and didn't do much studying lol.

i walked thirty minutes back to shijo eki, where i get on the hankyu to go home. talked to matt (who should've been asleep!) on skype until dinner. put in three endorphin-filled hours at the sports club, came home, shower/ofuro, and now i'm finally finishing this post that i started hours ago XD

sooo much more to say than just this superficial stuff, but i'll forget entirely later on if i don't get something down now :)

oh yeah, placed request for sun tzu's the art of war at the doshisha library.

and i have my japanese reading/writing class midterm tomorrow at 9am.
haven't studied. i might *think* about it tomorrow after breakfast.
....what's the point? i wouldn't do much better with lots of studying anyway.
it won't be a piece of cake, but i don't imagine it being very difficult at all.
:P

not a promise

i can't promise that i'll update on everything that i said i would [soon].

not that i've been particularly "busy", but the fact that i haven't found time to blog kind of speaks to that effect. it hasn't been easy trying to find all the good things about japan. on the subway ride home yesterday, mia and i worked on making a list of the things we'll miss when we leave in 83 days. [but who's counting? hahaha]

i have an oral "interview" in an hour for which i have yet to 'prepare'. my speaking skills have gone so far down the drain, and i feel like there's little i can do about it. BUT i'm ready to try a hundred times harder to love the time that i have left here. it doesn't mean that i'm going to try to like what i've disliked up until now. it just means that i'm going to get creative and find.....

RUNNING LATE.
later!

a very happy valentine's day :)

i'm in a weird place mentally right now, so i won't get into the specifics of today yet.

in one sentence:
mia and i ventured to arashiyama to see gio-ji.

[maybe i'll blog after the gym tonight. and maybe update on tokyo too.]

my plan until dinner:
listen to jack johnson and do some journaling.

my life has changed pretty dramatically since high school.
i have much to think about, and much to sort out.
but i'm happy and wouldn't have anything any other way.
.....things are the way they are for a reason :)

the 100th post!

...and it's nothing special XD

the internet is down at my house for maintenance until tomorrow, so i'm on some other wireless network. anyway, i got home and freaked out when i couldn't get online v_v

i am wayyy too dependent on the internet.
not a good thing.

but i killed 3+ hours at the gym tonight :)
yay!
^_^

p.s. tomorrow and valentine's day are going to be absolute insanity.
just wait for it :)

national foundation day

heard of it before? no?
...neither have i.

but because it's a national holiday, the gym was closed today >_<

on another note, my heart is bursting with happiness :)
i love my friends so so so much.
and someone else is also making me smile more often ^_^

meanwhile, it's almost midnight.
and i have an essay to write.
...which was due last friday XD

the assignment ~ my suggestion for japanese people
oh dear.

les étoiles!

they were out tonight!
accompanied by a beautiful full moon ^_^

i arrived in kyoto around 6:30am from a three-day trip to tokyo.
stories later. mia + danielle ♥ !!!

i tried sleeping in for a few hours after a restless night on the bus,
but that failed miserably, so i...

• watched two episodes of the L word in bed <3
• talked to a certain someone ♥ && it turns out i really was just paranoid (mia & danielle ~ i know, i know. i should've listened to you from the start LOL)
• downloaded some movies ~ which i will watch on my ipod at the gym
• spent three hours working out ~ 1 hr 45 min of intense cardio, weight training, flexibility/cheer stuff... it was soooo nice ^_^
• took a hot shower followed by the even hotter ofuro

.....going to bed now. write more later.

p.s. just putting this out there ~ i will never stop thinking that japan is crazy. and i will never stop thinking about how i could be at midd or at home with family. BUT ~ there is no self-pitying or anything of that sort to be had. i'm not wishing my time in japan away (with which i've been blessed). sometimes i just wish that i could experience the next three months on fast forward and finally get to go home ^_^

twinkle twinkle little star

...how i wonder where you are

i haven't been able to see the stars in a very long time...
i look up at the sky every night walking home from katsura eki && i've been disappointed day after day recently.

but that's something minor, right?
i mean, i can't control the overcast skies or anything like that.

well take that, and add it to the exhaustive list of disappointments and frustrations throughout the day. by the time i make it back to my host family's house---

me: i'm a giant ball of negativity
will: i'd say you're a small ball of intense negativity

[dinner time. maybe i'll come back to this post with happy thoughts ^_^]

edit:
my host family is seriously awesome.
i'd be kicking and screaming to get out if it weren't for them <3

3 months, 7 days

.....but who's counting?

>_<

i want out.

if i could leave japan right now, i'd JUMP at the chance.

can't waste any more time

being sick for almost a week and a half has taken its toll >_<

for starters, i haven't been to the gym, so i feel really sluggish. also, doing nothing but sleeping (and knitting mindlessly) has done a number on my motivation to do schoolwork. now that i'm better and can actually concentrate, i'd like to work harder and get caught up on my classes.
(i haven't done much of anything in the past several days.) when i'm ahead of schedule, i'm super-effective. when i'm behind, i'm the worst procrastinator ~ i blog and i shop <--sooo bad for the wallet lol

if i can harness my (aimless) restlessness and refocus that energy, i should be golden by the end of next week :)

SNOW!

seriously running late. update more after class.

this is from yesterday:
(p.s. it was a lot prettier than what the camera could capture)




test went well ~ 90.5%
...even with sleep deprivation and no studying :)

chinese new year :)

my family is nuts, but i love them sooo sooo much :)

giddy :)

for a lot of reasons ^_^




恭喜发财！happy chinese new year!

...this is pretty much a video about nothing, but i'm just so excited :)
[and still don't have the voice to express it fully, haha]

tonsillitis?

i don't know. judging by my symptoms and looking at all the possible things it could be, tonsillitis (hopefully not strep throat) seems likely. if my throat doesn't look better soon, i think i better take up on my host mom's offer to bring me to the hospital.

i've missed two days of japanese class and three days of electives. i feel slightly overwhelmed by how far behind i feel. i know i'll probably catch up in no time---but i'm used to being ahead, so i'm not a happy camper right now (for a variety of reasons).

my head is spinning, and i don't particularly feel like writing a whiny post right now ~ so i'll write one tomorrow XD

i'll hopefully be able to talk without my throat hurting soon, but until then, no video :(

the glass is half full :)

(volume needs to go up ~ a lot. i'm really sorry v_v)

...my point exactly.
it always appears to be recording, but then it stops without warning.
i'll try to finish this one tomorrow.

today in a nutshell--- it could've been a "bad day" on so many levels,
but it was still an awesome day (the way i see it =D)