...continued

i talked to the resident director (prof. lofgren - oberlin) about the frustrations and lack of motivation that seem to follow us (akp students) every once in a while. or perhaps it's a little more often than "every once in a while" XD

but anyway, i felt a lot better afterward.
he said a lot of things about why that could be ~ i'll share just one:

"[akp] isn't college."

and i think he's right. for the past two years, we've all adjusted to (and come to love?) college life && for this year, we're living under someone else's roof, someone else's rules. akp's academic atmosphere also does not feel like "college".

so.... how do i feel now?
- i'll finish akp as best i can ~ i've driven my grades down the drain compared to fall term [hopefully, i'm still within B+ range >_<]
- i'm still REALLY excited to go home and see my family <3
[and visit midd before finals are over?]
- counting down the days until america... but probably only until matt gets here XD [then i might not want to go home as quickly lol]

what can i say?

^_^

i'm really happy. japanese class is going as well as it's going to be.
electives are still pretty awesome. i LOVE ecology class :)

my friends are the best i could ever ask for.
they make life fun and interesting every day.

skyping with alice & matt is a great way to start my day.
....even if it means i'm only half awake at first :D

i'm not in a "relationship". and nor do i want to be in one right now,
but i've found something i won't let go of too easily <3

two months, one week. so close, and not so far.
i'll be going home soon ~ and that makes me appreciate japan much more.

=)

not going anywhere

both religion and ecology midterms have been taken.

i hope i did well enough so that i'm not in danger of possibly not making an A in either. even if nothing goes according to "plan", aiming to earn high honors upon graduation gives me a goal to work toward ~ incentive to keep motivation levels up && reason to make the most out of japan.

thesis prep work. very intimidating. good.
the more seemingly impossible, the better.
bring it on.

thanks to a certain someone, i've had my senses knocked back into me.
since when have i run from a challenge??

my refound motivation isn't going anywhere anytime soon.
=)

who am i??

things for friday:
- kanji quiz
- listening comprehension hw
- speech (about 5 minutes) in japanese
- akp research grant proposal

thursday night:
- didn't study for quiz
- listening comp. hw done
- 30 seconds of speech written
- no progress on proposal

- didn't go to gym. sports bras were all in wash or still damp :(
- decided to nap at 11:30pm
- woke up at 5:30am the next morning when matt called me on skype

friday morning:
- talked to matt for a couple hours before deciding to finish speech
- didn't prepare slideshow of pictures i wanted to show during presentation
- studied for quiz on hankyu
- practiced speech (from my macbook! >_<) on subway
- late to class by two minutes = no time to print speech
- finished quiz before the last person, so i didn't delay class. *whew*
- but not coming in early = vocab used in speech not written on blackboard = minor delay *fail*

the speech went fine. it could've been a lot better, but i did my best. (and plus, it can ALWAYS be better. there's no use being hard on myself ^_^)

friday afternoon:
- religion class. (to make up the class that got canceled last week)
- back to the akp lounge to work on grant proposal
- skyped with matt XD
- proposal due at 5pm ~ it got turned in at 4:55pm

since last year, i've never been this bad at meeting deadlines >_<
akp's making me soft. can't wait to get back to midd's rigorous pace.
like mia said, i probably wouldn't be happy unless i were buried up to my neck in work XD

blahhh

the reading/writing midterm was ridiculously easy. and "studying" wouldn't have helped much. (if at all)

anyway, i had over five hours after the test until the ecology field trip. i could've gotten some "work" done, but i didn't. instead, i hung out with my friends in the akp lounge until most of them headed off for (the earlier) translation class. at that point, a few of my other friends and i decided to study some birds because the ecology professor hinted that there might be a field quiz. (and there was one---on the eurasian tree sparrow and pale thrush.) even after we reviewed various species, there was still a lot of time to kill before 3pm came around.

...and i became incredibly restless >_<

thankfully, the field trip to gosho was relatively fun :)
well, any time i spend with mia, nestor, and david (abramovitz) is awesome <3

went home. dinner. gym. shower. (and no hw, haha)
pretty typical day.

j'adore le français

again, in a nutshell:
[perhaps i'll elaborate later... but maybe not lol]

the oral "exam" went fine. i could've done a lot better (as compared to language school), but i'm satisfied with how i did. ben (wesleyan) and becca (wellesley) are two of my favorite people in the program ~ our oral interviews were one right after the other, so we went out for coffee in shijo afterward.

then i met up with mia at shijo eki and walked to kyoto eki from there. we went to see the robert doisneau gallery at an art museum on the seventh floor of the station. i miss french sooo much. even before the gallery, i've often thought about picking it up again. so i might. senior year :)

for lunch, subway! it was one of the most delicious lunches i've had in a while. first time in nearly six months. since there was nowhere we could go to just sit and do some studying, we settled for the mister donut food court. and we sat there and didn't do much studying lol.

i walked thirty minutes back to shijo eki, where i get on the hankyu to go home. talked to matt (who should've been asleep!) on skype until dinner. put in three endorphin-filled hours at the sports club, came home, shower/ofuro, and now i'm finally finishing this post that i started hours ago XD

sooo much more to say than just this superficial stuff, but i'll forget entirely later on if i don't get something down now :)

oh yeah, placed request for sun tzu's the art of war at the doshisha library.

and i have my japanese reading/writing class midterm tomorrow at 9am.
haven't studied. i might *think* about it tomorrow after breakfast.
....what's the point? i wouldn't do much better with lots of studying anyway.
it won't be a piece of cake, but i don't imagine it being very difficult at all.
:P

"budding talents"

(it's a little soft, so you might have to turn the volume up ~ sorry!)

i have a ton more to add---maybe tomorrow?
(do i ever run out of things to say? lol ^_^)

marshes, birds, and getting lost.

much more happened at both the marsh and kitaoji station,
but i'm running late for dinner in shijo with a few friends...
so write more when i get back? maybe... ^_^

[edit]
after dinner:



(....this is what i sound like?? lol)

some things never change =D

i pulled my first all-nighter of spring term on thur/fri.
(yes, it's only been a week since classes began haha)

BUT
it was one of the best ones :)

let me explain. it was an essay in japanese for ono-sensei's reading class. the topic was very generic/not that interesting---something "confusing/perplexing/you've noticed" about the japanese language. however, i really got into it and wound up writing over 1000 characters (well over the mininum length). it wasn't the length that took up so much time. rather, it was word/expression choice and writing style that kept me up. i was constantly revising and finding better ways to express what i wanted to convey.

writing is one of my favorite things about learning japanese, but i have writing assignments all the time---meaning, that wasn't enough to make it an "awesome" all-nighter. throughout the night and into the morning, i had the (online) company of friends and family---my mom, alice (and cameron, curran, and mele), matt, leslie, and nikki =] even at 3, 4am, i was wide awake (thanks to caffeine, perhaps?) and wasn't dying to go to sleep.

how it turned out:
- i have an essay i'm really happy with
- high spirits after talking/seeing my friends on aim and skype
- making it through japanese class (sleep-deprived) just fine
- after a cool field trip & mini-adventure with mia, went home, had dinner, and accidentally fell asleep at 8pm while waiting for ofuro
- woke up at 9am today (sat) & i feel great ^_^

......seriously??

second day of japanese religion.

i greatly enjoyed the actual lecture, but there were some students (college juniors!) who were being obnoxious and childish ~ inappropriate and unrelated comments were made throughout the 90-minute class period... they drove me up a wall *grrr*

>_<

oh no! it's ono!

...not so much ^_^

for spring term, my reading teacher is ono-sensei. despite horror stories from other people, i'm actually looking forward to her classes. during orientation week, all the language teachers rotated to get a feel for each of the provisional levels. i remember ono-sensei making a good impression on me, but she was kind of intimidating for others. 

there's something about her that reminds me of the (very traditional) chinese school teachers with whom i had classes in new york city...

fall term grades in!

A ~ japanese language (counted twice)

A ~ japanese animation

A ~ language in popular media

:)

it's finished

(and now, instead of sleeping, i'm writing a quick entry ^_^)

i finished doing my japanese hw a while ago, but for tonight, it consisted of looking up over eighty vocabulary words and expressions to be able to do the reading effectively. needless to say, the first assignment of spring term took much longer than usual.

and this is what i have to say:

i hope it stays this way! ^_^

the beginning of the second half

first day of japanese "class" went really well :)
sooo excited for spring term.

japanese religion was also scheduled for today, but it was canceled because the professor caught something on the plane ride over to japan... hope she feels better soon.

worked out to my heart's content this afternoon :)
so much free time today! i got back from the gym earlier than usual and still had some down time before dinner ^_^

....and tomorrow's friday! just one class in the morning. then a friend is throwing an all you can eat/all you can drink party at a bar that i have to get directions to---to which another friend responded, "don't bother. she'll just get horribly lost. i'll take her."

hahaha XD

ten days

...since my last entry.

i figured i'd have to make some time to update. it's nearly midnight, and it's been an exhausting week, so i'll do my best to be somewhat coherent.

first big news: my sister alice has been accepted to middlebury (early decision) for the class of 2013! the couple days leading up to december 13 were too full of anxiety and excitement--sooo glad it's done and over with. congratulations, alice! you've worked so hard ~ you deserve it!

second big news: leslie came to kyoto and stayed with me this week. it was great to finally see her again after four months :)  leslie, have fun in hokkaido and tokyo with your family! i'll miss you, but september will be here before we know it... can't wait!

not big news: three more "meetings" with starbucks guy since the last entry. the next time i have an opportunity to talk to him, i will. for real, this time.

now on to smaller updates...

#1 end of fall term class party with imao-sensei

￥10000 (about the equivalent of $100 USD)

this was really yummy, but it was also really difficult to eat.  

we called for reinforcements after a little while... 

not even half-way in, and most of us were about to give up.

#2 starbucks.

i'm still going. everyday. overkill? perhaps. 

why am i going so often? many reasons. 

for one, obviously, the coffee. 

two, i love the atmosphere (awesome for reading). 

three, it's a great place to meet up with friends. 

four, it's one of few places in kyoto where 

one can actually sit down and 

have conversation for hours on end. 

five, i come across (interesting) people 

that i normally wouldn't otherwise.

#3 finals week.

i have never been so relaxed around exam time.

there was no need to cram or study excessively.

i reviewed the material with some friends at starbucks

in between good conversation and just plain silliness :)

[elective grades aren't in yet, but i received an A for japanese]

#4 leslie!

mia and i were able to spend a lot of time with leslie

over the past few days. we did a ton of shopping and

ate delicious ramen. we also had yummy chinese food with

nestor and greg before they went to nagano for part of break.

grant also met us at starbucks for more catching up/reminiscing

over some good coffee before he had to head home to pack.

#5 awesome finds.

(the perfect) off-white wool coat on sale.

cute deep purple dress from zara.

new bag! similar style. different color.

beautiful handmade pouch with eiffel tower.

lots of inexpensive, but pretty jewelry.

<3

ligers & tigons

i missed out on THREE weeks of total insanity. okay, not really. but i moved up and absolutely loved japanese class today. it was SO much fun, and i finally felt "challenged". class wasn't difficult by any means, but i definitely welcomed the faster pace. we already covered blood type personalities in summer school, but i don't mind doing it again because it's an interesting topic :)

someone led us off-topic before we actually got to the reading... we wound up talking about the difference between ligers and tigons...

^_^

déjà vu

once again, i find myself stuck between levels. at the advice of prof. lofgren and my friends, i finally approached my homeroom teacher about how easy class was for me. and after [a ton] of talking with various sensei, they decided that i should move up for a week and see how it is. i don't think it'll be very difficult at all, but the problem is, we're already three weeks in. at least when i moved up in summer school, it was only the second day of classes. 

why do i keep finding myself in these kinds of situations? >_<

bring it on.

[coming soon ~ blog entry on the BEST friday night ever ]

ups & downs

sorry it's a little blurry v_v

*i apologize in advance for the fairly negative entry, but i didn't want to sugarcoat things, or leave out the bad for the sake of keeping up appearances.*

so i don't know what it was about this morning that just made me not in the best of moods... i have reading/writing class on wednesdays (as opposed to language/grammar the rest of the week), and i usually look forward to the change of pace. but as class went on, i found myself less and less willing to participate. my mind had begun to preoccupy itself with something i've worked hard to shelter myself from thinking about. [yes, it's about a guy. and no, chances are, it's not who you're thinking of. or maybe it is, lol ^_^] 

so then class ended, and we received our graded second-draft essays back. i got an A+!  [i really owe a lot to summer school for my writing. out of reading, speaking, listening, etc, i think it's my most improved area by far.] so yay, good grade. but good grade = good mood? ...no, not necessarily. i killed an hour and a half in the akp lounge waiting for lunch with prof. lofgren ~ talking to people, checking email, using nestor as a pillow as i mindlessly watched this japanese film about food, sex, and etiquette... 

anyway, i went out to lunch to café bazaar with resident director/professor lofgren and four other akp students (nestor, elliot, althea, and david) to talk about life in japan so far. [and problems with classes, homestays, etc] it was a good time, for the most part. prof. lofgren told us to just "suck it up"-- in regards to some minor complaints about classes. i was slightly annoyed by that, but i just brushed it off. and then not surprisingly, the whole midd "clique" thing came up.

don't even get me started. i was nice about it earlier, but now i'm just... *grumble* we hang out because we enjoy each other's company. and other people hang out with the people they like too. so what's the problem? well we all happen to be middlebury students, and somehow, that makes it "wrong". we're by no means an exclusive group, and i'm really sick and tired of constantly explaining that to people. furthermore, i always make an effort to acknowledge everyone in the room, not just my close friends. [at least althea notices that >_<] but then someone mentions that the "midd kids" are not exactly on her friends' good sides. normally, i would care. that would bother me. but guess what? it doesn't. why? because if they're that quick to judge us without even trying to get to know us, then i'm not so sure i'd want to be friends with them anyway.

...so on to the ups of today. besides the job well done on the essay, lunch was on akp today :)  i had the "taco rice", which consisted of a fried egg on top of some ground beef with rice on a bed of shredded cheese, lettuce, and diced tomatoes. [tako in japanese means octopus, so that brought some initial confusion lol] i thought it was pretty delicious ^_^ throughout the meal, there were humorous anecdotes from everyone-- and they made me smile, so that's good :)  after lunch, we went back to the lounge, where i saw mia and danielle :)  and they made me smile too ^_^  i adore them sooo much! around 3pm, my friends all left for their landscape gardens class--which i'm not in--so i headed home.  

a crazy, hyper dachshund greeted me at the door. his name is leo. he's about seven years old and belongs to my host sister mari. leo stays with us when her family gets really busy and isn't home much. [leo has separation anxiety?] this little dog reminds me a lot of lei ~ my crazy, hyper black lab back in new hampshire ^_^

playing with lulu and leo definitely lifted my spirits, and i'm expecting to be in a much better mood once i get that sports club membership tonight :)

akp thank you party for the doshisha students

left to right: chiai, me, masato's friend && masato

before the thank you party, i really didn't know what to expect. would we all just sit together and eat? i was worried that we wouldn't be able to mingle with the japanese students very well. on the contrary, the night was a hit ^_^  i met up with one of the students who guided me around during orientation [masato && aya] and met some of his friends from esa, or english students association.

me && manami

and then out of nowhere, i hear nestor say, "she takes chinese too." i instinctively turned around to see what was going on. nestor introduced us, and the rest is history :) through our conversation in both japanese and english, i find out that she loves shopping and the color pink! then she asked me if i had a cell phone so that we could exchange information. after having "phone sex" [i'll probably write about that at some point...], we compared class schedules and found that we are both relatively free on tuesdays, so we're going shopping next tuesday ^_^

i was also invited to karaoke tomorrow night with chiai, masato, and his friend. the homework pile grew pretty big though =\  i had planned on getting ahead tonight, but i'm already behind on what's due for tomorrow... so that's very unlikely. *grumble*

staying in on a friday night

after a long few days.

my body is exhausted. and probably extremely confused. i won't get into details here, but i haven't been feeling 100% for about a week now. so while my friends are shopping in shijo, then dining out, and finally off to karaoke afterward, i'm sitting in front of the computer at 8:30pm writing this post. 

during summer school, after doing the same reading assignment, class was held in a very similar fashion as today's was held. <--poorly phrased. i'll edit it when i'm not so tired. [but anyway,] japanese class this morning was like a 90-minute long déjà vu. 

page 1.  mistakes?  there are probably many LOL ^_^

after lunch today, i worked to finish my essay that was due by 5pm. i started writing it this morning before i left for class, but had outlined a draft the night before. i finally scribbled the last characters around 3:30pm in the akp lounge. i could've gone home then, but i decided to stick around to hang out with some of the other [non-middlebury!] akp students. i made it back by 5pm or so, took a nap until dinner, ate dinner, and now after this post, i'm going to bed.

^_^